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Archive for November, 2004

Billyuns and billyuns

November 9th, 2004

I’m going to take a break from my vitriolic vector today to give a nod to Carl Sagan, who was born on this day in 1934 and died Dec. 20th, 1996. I remember wishing that the man would have lived to see the 21st century; I’m sure he would have found it hilarious. His book Dragons of Eden had a big influence on me in my college days – I even wrote a paper about it for an anthropology class.

He was a skeptic and philosopher in the most pragmatic sense of the word, and I think his cool-headedness would be of great use to us these days. “Where we have strong emotions, we’re liable to fool ourselves,” he once said, and I can say that about both sides of the political environment we currently find ourselves in.

Sorry you didn’t get to see the Mars landing, or the first orbital flight, Carl. Hope things are going well on the other side.

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An island unto himself

November 8th, 2004

Let the healing begin! I’m so ready to embrace the rest of the nation now, it’s almost killing me. We’re so much alike in so many ways, it’s scary.

Anastasia was talking to people at work, and what struck them the most, more than anything else, was how out of touch we feel with the rest of the country we live in. We have radically different opinions about God,. homosexuality, Fox News, and the environment. There is a giant swath of red in the center of the country. We have no idea why they think the way they do – they might as well live on Mars, for all we know, and I’m sure they feel the same way about us. Compare a Bush endorsement with a Kerry endorsement to see how crazily skewed things are.

So, can those boundaries be healed? Will the country ever come together? I hope not, and I’m not saying that because I’m being curmudgeonly. I look at my peers, the people in the intellectual community of the Left, and at the residents of the Blue states, and we are so different from the rest of the nation we might as well be part of Canada ( or the Reds be part of Mexico, which would amuse me to no end ). Healing isn’t possible – it shouldn’t be possible, because if the nation is “healed,” it means the Left has surrendered. There is no surrender, as far as I’m concerned. The battle begins anew, like it did 4 years ago, and like it will no doubt start again in the future. See you on the front lines.

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Goodie Gumdrops

November 5th, 2004

So, I’ve been thinking, and an email from Greg in Australia kind of reaffirmed things for me. Before, when the US was doing all kinds of crazy shit, invading nations and stuff like that, the People of the World ( that’s the world outside of the US ) blamed the US administration but believe that, generally speaking, the actual inhabitants of the US were good and true. Now that we have actually endorsed that monkey, I’m guessing that the rest of the world might not be so hot on us. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that they might think we’re assholes.

I don’t blame them, incidentally. We are assholes.

Also, I made a mistake in yesterday’s post on #3. The draft age will be raised to 34 from 25, so I’m still eligible. We’ll also “…be required to regularly update the agency on [our] skills until [we] reach age 35.” Won’t that be awesome! I can barely wait until I’m able to report to the US Shadow Government my skills, so they can put me to the best use possible.

Sadly, however, I don’t know how to use computers ( my dog is typing this for me ), and I feel that people should speak English or just grunt, so I won’t be able to help them with their computer technician/linguist shortage.

What’s that you say? This new bill will never be passed, since it would have to go through the House and Senate, then not be vetoed by the President? Whew, good point. As long as there’s some sort of balance out there, we should be fine.

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Partisan Forever

November 4th, 2004

So, my blind rage from yesterday has been replaced by a smoldering hatred. I worked out for 2 1/2 hours yesterday, and I’m betting I’ll be doing it again today.

Anyway, to show you I’m not a poor sport, I wrote:
10 Good Things About Bush Winning

9. I always liked Planet of the Apes
8. Four years of content for my blog.
7. I’m a small business owner, and the tax cuts – BWAHAHAHAHAAA!! Sorry, I was almost able to finish that one.
6. Diminishment of those pesky civil liberties
5. Mixing Church and State means I can pray AND get car registered
4. No children will be left behind.
3. I’m too old to be drafted
2. Legitimate reason not to visit the South
1. Holiday time with Republican family members.
0. Reaffirmation in my belief that half the people in the US are assholes.

Oh, and putting aside partisan politics and cooperating with the new administration? Fuck you.

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< no subject >

November 3rd, 2004

By 10 days, I meant 10 hours. Kerry just conceded the election, ushering in a new era of prosperity and hope. I can barely fucking wait.

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The Wire

November 3rd, 2004

So, sure as shit, it’s down to Ohio. Last I checked, it’s Bush by 136,221 votes. No provisional ballots have been checked yet, but Kerry would have to win a substantial portion of them. I’m trying to remain optimistic, but I haven’t had a whole lot to base optimism on in the past 4 years. We’ll have to wait at least 10 days for a decision, provided the Supreme Court doesn’t take an interest and call it for Bush sooner, on the premise of “because we fucking feel like it.”

Guess the ‘Publies were right – good move to use voter intimidation in Ohio. The beauty of this was even if the case gets appealed again somehow, there’s no way you can ever quantify how many votes were lost because untrained Republican challengers were standing at the polls. Brilliantly played, worthy of the Khmer Rouge.

A ‘Publie controlled House, Senate, and potentially the Presidency. The mind fucking boggles at that.

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4 Dead In…

November 3rd, 2004

Just got home from the parents’ house – we were doing some TV watching to see how the election results were rolling in. We were feeling pretty good when Pennsylvania went to Kerry, but then those assholes down in Florida went to Bush, reaffirming my oath to never travel south of New England again. The eyes are on Ohio – either way it falls, I’m sure there are going to be challenges to the results.

Kerry can take New Hampshire (4), Michigan (18), maybe New Mexico (5) and Nevada (4), Oregon(7), and Washington(11). That’s 237 right there. From what I’m looking at right now at 12:30am, he’s ahead in Minnesota(10), Iowa(7), and Wisconsin(11), but it’s by a hair’s breadth. That’s a total of 265, still short of victory. It all comes down to Ohio. If Bush takes Ohio, that’s 258 for him, still not enough for victory. It’ll go to the House of Reps, and since they’re publies, Bush will win.

There were some Republican Ohio residents at Rob and Annie’s wedding. We should have taken them out when we had the chance.

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A Friendly Reminder

November 2nd, 2004

Fucking vote, asshole!

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Get out there tomorrow…

November 1st, 2004

Got some great links from a friend of mine. First off, that your tax dollars are supporting Homeland Security by targetting toy stores. I loved this. My favorite line:

One of the things that our agency’s responsible for doing is protecting the integrity of the economy and our nation’s financial systems and obviously trademark infringement does have significant economic implications.

For everyone who told me I was too cynical in my “follow the money” stance on EVERYTHING, I feel vindicated.

This LiveJournal post is really the meat of what I want to rant about today. Someone said some “inflamatory things” about the president in his Live Journal, and the Secret Service showed up at his door to cause some trouble. Nazi Germany, everyone?

The post above is supposed to be some sort of warning, I guess – that Big Brother is watching you, and that you should really be careful with what you say. Fuck that shit, says I. Countless thousands of men and women bled and died in this country so that we as a people can make our voices heard. I might think John Ashcroft, Karl Rove, Dick Cheney, Bill O’Reilley, Donald Rumsfeld, Ronald Reagan, Paul Wolfowitz, Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Rupert Murdoch, Arnold Schwartzenegger and both George Bush-es are assholes, but someone else can say both Clintons, John Stewart, the Press, John Kerry, Al Sharpton, Barak Obama and John Edwards are liberal pricks and I would defend their right to say it. I might come after what they’ve said, of course, but that’s OK. It’s called “dialogue.”

Anyway, to save the FBI and Secret Service some time ( Hi guys! ) I’m going to write down my confessions here so they don’t have to go to all the trouble of continuing to tap my phones.

I’ve smoked pot. I’ve looked at pornography on the InterWeb. I had a girlfriend who had an abortion. I’m planning on voting for Kerry tomorrow. I hate the war in Iraq, and don’t support it. I was pulled over for speeding once when I was 17 and implicated in a grand theft ring at Herman’s sporting goods for which I had no part. I’ve never been arrested. I shoplifted some gum when I was 9. When I was 13 I was with a friend of mine when he shoplifted a bunch of Spelljammer role playing books from Walden books, and I didn’t tell anyone about it. I’ve paid money for merchandise that was probably stolen. I drink and smoke cigars. I take joy in reading books on the banned books list, but feel censorship should start and stay in the home. I support the Open Source movement. I’ve played pirated video games.

My wife is a director at a union. My parents were involved in a teacher’s strike in the late 60s. I have a strike-breaker uncle, but we don’t talk about him much. I knew of kids who used and sold heroin, crack, and cocaine and I didn’t notify the authorities. I don’t own a handgun. I hate the Homeland Securities act. I cried when I watched Fareinheit 9/11. I think we as a society are headed in a self-destructive direction, and I wish we could reverse it. I think Ken Lay is guilty. I like Eliot Spitzer. I think gay people should be allowed to get married. I support stem cell research. I’m still unsure of how I feel about gun control. I think Budweiser is a terrible beer. I don’t like cops, but appreciate they’re just doing an underpaid job. I’m an agnostic. I wish for a better future and I feel that people are probably going to have to fight and die to get it.

That’s pretty much it for me. I can send you a picture, if you like. You have my email address and my physical address – drop by any time.

Sincerely Yours,

[Name Redacted], 29 years old
Caucasian Male, Heterosexual, Catholic
Married 6 years, No children

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